Why do we believe we should love one another? Why do we have this as the core of our values? It doesn’t fit an evolutionary edge when a soldier leaps on a grenade to save his fellow soldiers or a fireman races into a wildly burning World Trade Center to save others. It is something that goes beyond the material. It is from my view a gift from God. It is the gift bestowed upon us to make us more human. Not biologically but deep in our souls.
When two people who are young and naive engage in what many call holy matrimony, proposing that two people, who will change dramatically, should jump in with both feet, it seems materially foolish. From my perspective it is God’s gift of the capacity to love that gets them through it. There will be conflicts, but if they can grow in love there can be a generosity of spirit that diminishes the hurtfulness of the conflicts and undergirds the stability of the marriage. Isn’t this why the married despite the obstacles can be full of hope?